So I've been thinking about some mom stuff. I am sad that I will never have any more kids. I wasn't planning on having more, so you wouldn't think it would bother me. It's just that it's not my choice, it's as though the choice was taken from me & that bothers me. The amount of decline after each child is significant, that combined with the fact I have EDS mean I just can't risk myself to have any more children. That's just sad to me. Dunno if that made any sense to anyone but me, lol.
Another thing is Toad's pre-school starts registration for the next year this coming week. They have 3 options; 2 are 2 days a week, either mornings or afternoons & 1 is 3 days a week, mornings. This is a change from this year where the kids could do 3 days a week afternoons. The 3 day a week they will have will be very very school-like. I had already been thinking a bit about school since the parent/teacher conference. During that the teacher was all about how Toad isn't too great with scissors or proper crayon grip, the stuff she kicked butt at was kinda glossed over with a quick "I'm sure you know she know --- wonderfully". The scissors are quite large for her hand & I know I sucked with scissors & writing for a long time. I don't see what there is to worry about with a 3.5 year old, but they do. They sent home a pair of scissors for her to practice with. I have a pair here already. Her problem with them is opening them, I am thinking about getting a loop pair to try & see if those are easier for her, they are for me. It's got me thinking about school vs home-school. Not to sound like an over protective freak, but I don't want her to have to be held to useless standards. I learned to cut just fine, just a bit later than most. I loathed gym & a lot of it hurt. From the EDS side I can see a lot of advantages of home school for Toad, plus she is a very high energy kid & that was the other concern they had for her. She needs to learn to not be excited so much. I am going to give homeschool a try this summer with home pre-school & see how it goes.
About Me
- Queen Slug
- Little Town, Midwest, United States
- Just your average 30-something mom with EDS & Poland's Syndrome.
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4 comments:
Scissors... Ack! * Runs away Screeamingg! *
I used to have major pains with cutting... My first grade teacher used to keep me in during breaks and after school to get me to practice cutting. I just couldn't cut neat enough for her taste...not to mention the fact that it hurt like heck! I guess, my fingers weren't really proportioned properly to be able to use scissors (and I still have trouble with them).
How is it, that schools do not investigate these kind of concerns on a medical level? Especially during a childes greatest growth period? Surely seeing as they realize that the child has a problem outside of the norm, they could suggest a visit to a peadiatrition? or is it maybe that the peadiatrician just tells you ... nah, they'l grow out of it... I wish I could see the one that told my parents that and ask them what their opinion is now...
At any rate, enough ranting ;D. I guess home schooling would have it's advantages and disadvantages ... In your kid's case, most definately more of an advantage.
Sometimes though, it becomes a problem... as we have seen with my Cousin's kids. She decided to home school her kids and according to my dad, whom had visited them a while back, the kids are a little behind in their social development. The major problem is interaction with other kids. This is however most probably to do with my Cousins priorities... One could understand it thoug... She wants her kids to stay away from "bad" influences and stop them from becoming a "typical trouble teenager". This is compounded by the fact that my Cousin was not born in America and had a lot of South African influence while growing up...even while in America...from her parents.
South African's especially "Afrikaners" is much more conservative. Even the English South African's, although much less conservative than the Afrikaans South African's, is still much more conservative than American's.
Hmmm...where the heck was I going with this?
At any rate, I agree with you that in the case of your kid, it could be much more beneficial and save her from ache's and pains but...just as a suggestion?...make sure she still has a lot of interaction with other kids...like taking her to the park to play with the Neighbours kids... ;D
As for the lonely side... I hear you...I truely do. Family doesn't always really cut it either because they tend to be either "over sympathetic" or just totally ignorant...they would listen to you, but you would do much better talking to a brick wall... Then of course there is the factor of trying to tip-toe around their feelings... Say the wrong thing and you have WWIII on your hands...sheesh!
I hope you find someone to confide in!
I've been thinking about you a lot lately. I actually know exactly where you are coming from with respect to having more children. We tried for years and years (about 7) to have a child. There is no way we can even think about trying again now that we have Ashley. We just don't have the time or money and my husband is already an "older" father. Also, since I have been diagnosed with EDS that does change things for me.
Ashley just gave us quite a scare this past week. She had been sick and throwing up and ended up throwing up blood. She was rushed to the children's hospital in the city. Lots of questions about EDS kept coming up with respect to her health. The bleeding was from some stomach erosions which are already mostly healed now. Drs were wondering whether EDS contributed to the excessive bleeding and her condition. Only time will tell.
I have already been told to keep her out of dance and gymnastics. It breaks my heart. We will just see how it all sorts out with her as she grows up and if in fact she does have EDS. It's gross to think about the potential limitations and health issues she may have to deal with.
We have also talked about home schooling her. But even though she isn't in preschool til next fall, I think I will give her a few years in our local christian school for kindergarten and grade one to see how she does. We should start to know by then if she has physical limitations or EDS for sure.
I am sorry you are lonely. I am fortunate to have my family close by (my mother and I talk every day at least once), a great husband and about 2 really great friends to help me through life (Along with my faith in Jesus).
Do you need to relocate to be closer to someone who can help you and to share your life with? Obviously that is rather drastic, but we all need someone in our lives to love us and someone to share with - it is a basic human need and is as important as eating and drinking. I wish I could help you! I bet our kids would play quite nicely together, however, I do live in Canada... :)
Hang in there!
Theresa
Drake - Aren't scissors totally an evil force?
I looked a lot in the options in the community for her to get out with other kids, so she'll get plenty of time socializing.
TeeHart I'm in a funky headspace today, so I'll come back & reply to you later or tomorrow. <3
TeeHart - I have been working on trying to get my mother to move closer to me & while she wants to so far it's not been feasible. She was an only child so I've no aunts, uncles or cousins there & I was 1 of 2 kids & my sister is gone & never married or had kids. My father & I aren't that sort of close, we talk & what not, but he's not someone I lean on. He's also 1/2 way across the country most of the year & in Europe the rest of the year. So I don't have family close by or family I could more closer too.
I also don't belong to a church so I don't have that to lean on. I know many people with disabling medical issues can get their church to help with the practical as well as the emotional side. I've got a bajillion churches in this town, but none are even close to my faith so I don't go.
The homeschooling is just a bit due to the EDS & mostly due to the fact I don't much care for schools these days. I could go on, but I'll save that for another post another day.
Kind of a side note here, why is it for little kids tap is grouped with ballet? Why not tap & jazz or just tap? I think on a young level the kids would be ok with tap if the teacher of the class was made aware to not push ROM. Ballet, while EDS would help you kick butt, I can totally see as possibly damaging & would keep her out of.
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